I was sitting in the back seat behind the driver, holding my phone, laughing mid sentence and—BANG —
it burst! Whatburstthough? A balloon popping magnified a thousand times something XL / white / unknown in my peripheral vision.
As my brain tried to find the source of the noise, a sharp stabbing pain blossomed in my left side. I gasped for my next breath—
A stray thought—this is a car crash. i’m in a car crash—
I tried to slow my breath—if I could get my body to relax, then I could breathe through the pain—
The next breath, gasping turned into wheezing, the pain intensifying doubling tripling, an overwhelming wave of agony taking over. Suddenly I was screaming.
The sound was shocking: I didn’t want to scream, I didn’t tell my mouth to open and make that noise. It was high pitched, a sound of desperation, a wounded animal. Yet: I could not, not scream. My body needed the sound as I clutched at the pain and willed it to lessen.
Margot was suddenly next to me, touching me. “Are you okay?” I didn’t have the words to answer.
I just needed to be in less pain, not compressed like this. I struggled, pushing lamely at the car door and hoping it would open—I needed to be free of this car, this murdering metal hulk.
